The Celebrity Father Grudge Match
In this corner, representing the United States, Earl Woods, father of Tiger Woods:
In this corner, representing Canada, Walter Gretzky father of Wayne:
The bell rings...Earl Woods, the former marine, launches an uppercut to the chin:
Introduction The game of golf can be a metaphor for life. My life, for certain. I have experienced my share of birdies and a few eagles, yet it seems I have encountered more sand traps and bogeys than I care to recall. With every obstacle or challenge I've faced, however, I've managed to work through it and come out stronger and wiser. And as I walk down the 18th fairway of my lifetime, I hold my head high and make no apologies for the decisions and statements I have made.
Gretzky responds with an opening barrage of jabs to the solar plexus:
Now, for the first time, Walter tells at length the story of his life, about growing up on a small family farm, about meeting and marrying Phyllis, about raising four boys and a girl in a modest home in Brantford on the salary of a telephone repairman, about hanging onto his modesty and values when the comet of talent and celebrity hit.
The pummeling contines:
Walter also talks about the process of recovering from a stroke that came close to killing him ten years ago. Through his own grit and determination, and with the help of dedicated therapists and doctors, his family and friends, Walter battled back from an aneurysm that left him with many cognitive difficulties and destroyed a decade of memories—including his recollection of the death of his mother and almost all of Wayne’s NHL triumphs of the eighties.
Ooh. That's gotta hurt. Earl is taking a beating. How can you prevail over a 'triumph over adversity story'?
Woods isn't the only Tiger in the family. Earl retaliates with his signature move, the kid's book headlock:
Earl Woods, author of Training a Tiger, and his son Tiger have put together a wise and friendly manual for being a better friend, student, teacher, and community member, and it's so plainly written that middle schoolers can make as much use of it as their grandparents.
Walter is against the ropes...Wait a second! He's climbing the turnbuckle! It looks like a slam off the toprope! He's pulling out a newspaper clipping!
A 47-year-old woman in Trenton, Ont., with no history of stroke in her family, read an article in the Kingston Whig Standard about him that included details about stroke symptoms. Ten days later, while driving to work, her vision became blurred, she experienced numbness in a hand, and she became dizzy -- the same symptoms outlined in the newspaper article.
Earl is reeling. I don't know how he'll make it to the next round. Walter moves in for the pin. The ref's hand hits once, twice...and Earl kicks out of it with a reference to his Green Berets days in Vietnam...That plays well with the American crowd, Dan.
Raised by his sister after losing both of his parents by the time he was 13, he chose the military over a promising baseball career. He reveals the racial barriers that tortured him throughout his Army days, how he found his calling in the Green Berets and shocking details about his two tours of duty in Vietnam, where he met and befriended the original "Tiger," for whom his famous son is named.
The tables have turned. Walter is on the mat. It doesn't look good for the Canadian champ. But wait! He still has another trick up his sleeve! A Canadian fan has brought up a chair!
Wow, what an unorthodox move! From my vantagepoint, it appears to be an Adirondack chair made out of recycled hockey sticks. On the back support, Gretzky has signed it . Apparently, the fan purchased it in a fundraising auction for a local ringette team. Woods is down for the count once again. Let's see if he can get out of this one:
In talking to Earl Woods, Smith got quotes in which the father insisted that his son had been sent by God and that he would be the most important human ever – not the most important golfer or the most important athlete, but the most important human. "Tiger will do more than any other man in history to change the course of humanity," Earl Woods said. When Smith asked Earl Woods if he honestly thought his son – a golfer – would have more impact than Nelson Mandela, more than Gandhi, more than the Buddha, Earl Woods didn’t blink. "Yes, because he has a larger forum than any of them. Because he’s playing a sport that’s international. Because he’s qualified through his ethnicity to achieve miracles. . . . There is no limit because he has the guidance. I don’t know exactly what form this will take, but he is the Chosen One. He’ll have the power to impact nations. Not people. Nations. The world is just getting a taste of his power."
Wow, did this fight turn ugly. I thought I'd seen everything ringside when Tyson bit off Evander Holyfeld's ear in Vegas!
It's Gretzky by Disqualification in round one!
In this corner, representing Canada, Walter Gretzky father of Wayne:
The bell rings...Earl Woods, the former marine, launches an uppercut to the chin:
Introduction The game of golf can be a metaphor for life. My life, for certain. I have experienced my share of birdies and a few eagles, yet it seems I have encountered more sand traps and bogeys than I care to recall. With every obstacle or challenge I've faced, however, I've managed to work through it and come out stronger and wiser. And as I walk down the 18th fairway of my lifetime, I hold my head high and make no apologies for the decisions and statements I have made.
Gretzky responds with an opening barrage of jabs to the solar plexus:
Now, for the first time, Walter tells at length the story of his life, about growing up on a small family farm, about meeting and marrying Phyllis, about raising four boys and a girl in a modest home in Brantford on the salary of a telephone repairman, about hanging onto his modesty and values when the comet of talent and celebrity hit.
The pummeling contines:
Walter also talks about the process of recovering from a stroke that came close to killing him ten years ago. Through his own grit and determination, and with the help of dedicated therapists and doctors, his family and friends, Walter battled back from an aneurysm that left him with many cognitive difficulties and destroyed a decade of memories—including his recollection of the death of his mother and almost all of Wayne’s NHL triumphs of the eighties.
Ooh. That's gotta hurt. Earl is taking a beating. How can you prevail over a 'triumph over adversity story'?
Woods isn't the only Tiger in the family. Earl retaliates with his signature move, the kid's book headlock:
Earl Woods, author of Training a Tiger, and his son Tiger have put together a wise and friendly manual for being a better friend, student, teacher, and community member, and it's so plainly written that middle schoolers can make as much use of it as their grandparents.
Walter is against the ropes...Wait a second! He's climbing the turnbuckle! It looks like a slam off the toprope! He's pulling out a newspaper clipping!
A 47-year-old woman in Trenton, Ont., with no history of stroke in her family, read an article in the Kingston Whig Standard about him that included details about stroke symptoms. Ten days later, while driving to work, her vision became blurred, she experienced numbness in a hand, and she became dizzy -- the same symptoms outlined in the newspaper article.
Earl is reeling. I don't know how he'll make it to the next round. Walter moves in for the pin. The ref's hand hits once, twice...and Earl kicks out of it with a reference to his Green Berets days in Vietnam...That plays well with the American crowd, Dan.
Raised by his sister after losing both of his parents by the time he was 13, he chose the military over a promising baseball career. He reveals the racial barriers that tortured him throughout his Army days, how he found his calling in the Green Berets and shocking details about his two tours of duty in Vietnam, where he met and befriended the original "Tiger," for whom his famous son is named.
The tables have turned. Walter is on the mat. It doesn't look good for the Canadian champ. But wait! He still has another trick up his sleeve! A Canadian fan has brought up a chair!
Wow, what an unorthodox move! From my vantagepoint, it appears to be an Adirondack chair made out of recycled hockey sticks. On the back support, Gretzky has signed it . Apparently, the fan purchased it in a fundraising auction for a local ringette team. Woods is down for the count once again. Let's see if he can get out of this one:
In talking to Earl Woods, Smith got quotes in which the father insisted that his son had been sent by God and that he would be the most important human ever – not the most important golfer or the most important athlete, but the most important human. "Tiger will do more than any other man in history to change the course of humanity," Earl Woods said. When Smith asked Earl Woods if he honestly thought his son – a golfer – would have more impact than Nelson Mandela, more than Gandhi, more than the Buddha, Earl Woods didn’t blink. "Yes, because he has a larger forum than any of them. Because he’s playing a sport that’s international. Because he’s qualified through his ethnicity to achieve miracles. . . . There is no limit because he has the guidance. I don’t know exactly what form this will take, but he is the Chosen One. He’ll have the power to impact nations. Not people. Nations. The world is just getting a taste of his power."
Wow, did this fight turn ugly. I thought I'd seen everything ringside when Tyson bit off Evander Holyfeld's ear in Vegas!
It's Gretzky by Disqualification in round one!
