There Goes The Neighborhood: Advice For Mark
My old friend Mark knows how to appreciate the pastoral splendor of the countryside around his El Prado, New Mexico home. I always look forward to his purple prose.
He wrote me the following a while back, soliciting my advice, and I'm sure he won't mind if I ask my wise and worldly readers to contribute as well (writers like Mark deserve a wider audience):
The summer rains begin that afternoon. Clouds pile and roll over the peaks
and lightning cracks purple bolts. It’s magnificent. Nearly everyday a
rainbow (a double or a triple!) slides from the earth, arching over the
mountains and town. Leandro and I had just unloaded our first haul of boxes
at the new house and were leaving. Leandro had asked again if there was a
stream at this house. A car scooted around a bend in the lane and I pulled
over to let it pass by. While pointing to the whirl of clouds over the
mountains to Leandro, the car stopped, and through the rain-streaked window
two feet from my own, the face from newspapers and TV, the Secretary of
Defense, Donald Rumsfeld. My neighbor. He was beaming a smile and waving
at us. An appreciative motorist. A friendly neighbor. A politician.
The most malignant patriot drives a Toyota. His back-up Mazda in the
driveway. Secret service in Lincoln SUV’s surround the place.
There won’t be any petty crime at our new place. But it’s probably on
several lists as a place to blow up.
Leandro reminds me to dip my hand in the stream before holding the brown
trout and taking it off the hook. He wets his own hands. Takes hold of the
trout and eases it back to the river. He’s learning to read.
I’ve asked people for advice on how to deal with my new neighbor and
received:
-kick him in the balls
-flip him the bird
-“good, now the peace parades can end with a party at your house….”
-kill him with love
Send your heartfelt advice because I intend to present the list to the man
when I lend him a fly rod and invite him to join me on a stream. I hear he
attended Princeton, but it seems to me the guy needs some remedial work in
reading. I’ll pair him with Leandro, then vanish upstream; chapters of my
own lost since childhood to recover.
He wrote me the following a while back, soliciting my advice, and I'm sure he won't mind if I ask my wise and worldly readers to contribute as well (writers like Mark deserve a wider audience):
The summer rains begin that afternoon. Clouds pile and roll over the peaks
and lightning cracks purple bolts. It’s magnificent. Nearly everyday a
rainbow (a double or a triple!) slides from the earth, arching over the
mountains and town. Leandro and I had just unloaded our first haul of boxes
at the new house and were leaving. Leandro had asked again if there was a
stream at this house. A car scooted around a bend in the lane and I pulled
over to let it pass by. While pointing to the whirl of clouds over the
mountains to Leandro, the car stopped, and through the rain-streaked window
two feet from my own, the face from newspapers and TV, the Secretary of
Defense, Donald Rumsfeld. My neighbor. He was beaming a smile and waving
at us. An appreciative motorist. A friendly neighbor. A politician.
The most malignant patriot drives a Toyota. His back-up Mazda in the
driveway. Secret service in Lincoln SUV’s surround the place.
There won’t be any petty crime at our new place. But it’s probably on
several lists as a place to blow up.
Leandro reminds me to dip my hand in the stream before holding the brown
trout and taking it off the hook. He wets his own hands. Takes hold of the
trout and eases it back to the river. He’s learning to read.
I’ve asked people for advice on how to deal with my new neighbor and
received:
-kick him in the balls
-flip him the bird
-“good, now the peace parades can end with a party at your house….”
-kill him with love
Send your heartfelt advice because I intend to present the list to the man
when I lend him a fly rod and invite him to join me on a stream. I hear he
attended Princeton, but it seems to me the guy needs some remedial work in
reading. I’ll pair him with Leandro, then vanish upstream; chapters of my
own lost since childhood to recover.
