Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Mark Perkel's Idea

Let's Question Gonzales and Rove in secret foreign prisons

"...The Bush administration and Attorney General Gonzales don't want to testify to Congress under oath.
Congress is ready to subpoena them to force them to testify.
Bush threatens a constitutional showdown if they do.

Can a compromise be reached? Is there a way that Gonzales and Rove can be questioned
in a way that the Bush administration would approve of?

Bush and Gonzales have vigorously defended the use of secret prisons in foreign countries
as a way of getting to the truth. Both have stated to Congress that they are totally legal,
that they are not torture, and that they are effective.

So maybe we should send Gonzales and Rove to a secret foreign prison for questioning.
How could they object to that?
I bet the Democrats would go along with that".

Marc Perkel
San Bruno, CA

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Tuesday, March 27, 2007

I'm Not A Double Agent Working For Colbert Nation

I arrived in Canada shortly before the Colbert Report hit the airwaves. This is entirely coincidental. There's no conspiracy here. That's my story, and I'm sticking with it. Move along folks, nothing to see here.

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Monday, March 26, 2007

Organized People Should Get Lost!

...But of course they never would. They'd probably bring along extra maps, a compass, GPS and cell phone just to be safe.

Do I envy them their slavish devotion to the minutiae of life? Not one bit. When Thoreau said that "our lives are frittered away by detail", he was thinking about things like filing paperwork, organizing sock drawers, and writing lists.

All the same, I realize that it might be good for me to be somewhat more organized. I spent the first hour of my day searching for a misplaced set of keys.

Teaching guys like me to be organized is like teaching a bear to ride a bicycle. It can be done, but only by a trained professional that can dodge an island-sized paw now and then. Organized folks, it's not that we mean to frustrate you; we're actually a different species. I recommend viewing our attempts at aping your behaviour with detached bemusement. Think of us as chimpanzees wearing cowboy suits or seals clapping with their flippers.

My epiphany is that the world needs people who work on shoring up their weaknesses. It's a lot easier for a disorganized person to understand an organization system put together by another disorganized person. It's like the Microsoft/Apple divide: Microsoft designed software that made sense for people who understood programming, while Apple designed software for your average person. I'm sure that, in the process, Apple software engineers often tore their hip, urban attire in frustration trying to dumb things down for the simpletons in their focus groups.

If this last paragraph had been written by an organized person, this would be a clever concluding paragraph that would deftly touch upon my main points and reinforce my thesis.

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Saturday, March 24, 2007

MP Olivia Chow's Retrofit Video

Here it is. Politicians living the values they espouse. Hard to fathom, isn't it?

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Thursday, March 22, 2007

Chocolate Mousse


Wednesday, March 21, 2007


The problem is that they're convinced they're invulnerable at the precise point in life when they're most vulnerable. Don't grow up too soon, daughter of mine.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

New York Is For People Who Deserve It

...People like Sam Teigen, who appreciate and take advantage of the city's diversity.

For a slice of NYC, visit his Flickr page.

Some people might envy Sam's big city experiences. I envy his eye.

If he comes to visit some time, we'll get together at McSweeny's.

McSweeny's Snow White and the Seven Goths

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Thursday, March 15, 2007

Darling, We'll Always Have Minneapolis/St. Paul

News junkies such as myself are often drawn to the 'hard news' in The Onion rather than the editorials.

Because I want to keep abreast of the changes shaping our world, I'm drawn to headlines like "Christ Returns to the NBA", or "Taco Bell Launches New 'Morning After' Burrito"

Nevertheless, an editorial today hit pretty close to home:

Darling, We'll Always Have Minneapolis/St.Paul

This one goes out to you, kid--you know who you are.

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Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Whatcha Gonna Do When They Come For You?

So...Let's say you're the President of the United States.

The chief aide to your Vice President was convicted of perjury and obstructing justice, a hostile congress is launching investigation after investigation of your abuses of power, and the impeachment movement is gaining steam. What do you do?

The most logical thing to do...Fire all the lawyers!

If you choose this option, make sure that your lawyer doesn't get caught lying about the whole affair before congress. Oops!

Good thing you have a backup plan!

Perspective Check:
In Canada, the top news this hour:
A Canadian philosopher has won the world's richest individual award by promoting the message that the threat of terrorism could be solved by greater spiritual examination in Western and Islamic countries.

Perspective Check:

In the United States, the top news this hour:

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, suspected mastermind of the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks on the United States, confessed to those attacks and a string of others during a military hearing at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, said a transcript released Wednesday by the Pentagon.

Gee, if the Petagon says it, it must be true.

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Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Poetry Tuesday

Erat Hora

by Ezra Pound (1885-1972)

"Thank you, whatever comes." And then she turned

And, as the ray of sun on hanging flowers

Fades when the wind hath lifted them aside,

Went swiftly from me. Nay, whatever comes

One hour was sunlit and the most high gods

May not make boast of any better thing

Than to have watched that hour as it passed.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Magic Beans For Monday

I'm serving up Magic Beans for Monday courtesy of Peter Mayer:

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Saturday, March 10, 2007

Poutine Music Club Retro Lounge

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Sunday, March 04, 2007

The Most Dangerous Stretch of Road In Ontario

Highway 21 from Bayfield to Kincardine is the most dangerous stretch of road in Ontario this winter.

While the high winds are great for the turbines, they whip up the snow, making driving about as easy as nailing jello to a tree. Because of this, since February 2nd, the high school in Goderich has been closed as often as it's been open.

They're predicting 90km/hr. winds tomorrow. Buy stock in Vestas and hang onto your hats.

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Saturday, March 03, 2007

Not Going To Church This Sunday

God's had all the thoughts about the life, death, and the hereafter I care to give him/her/it this week. As for being a good person, I was planning to do that anyway.

Why does God seem to need so much praise? If I were omniscient, omnipotent, and in charge of everything, I wouldn't need to hear people singing my praises all the time.

Wouldn't you be embarassed if people sang "Rick, name above all names, beautiful savior, glorious lord"--even if it were true? You'd think that would get old after a while, and wouldn't you suspect that the people most devoted to singing your praises were a bunch of ass-kissers?

At times such as this, I ask myself, "W.W.S.S.J.D"--What would supply-side Jesus do?

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Thursday, March 01, 2007

Via Pat Crawford

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